My name is Wendy…
In November 2021, I suffered the most devastating loss. Ben, my husband, died suddenly in my arms at the age of 44, without warning, leaving me and our young children (6 and 2 at the time) to live a life without him.
My whole world was turned upside down. Hopes and dreams for a future together had vanished into thin air. The emotions I felt after his passing were ones I had never experienced before, not even when my dad passed away a couple of years before that.
My coping mechanisms at the time were to get out of bed every day to just put one foot in front of the other, keep a routine going for both the children and myself whilst carrying around the biggest weight on my shoulders and being surrounded by the greyest cloud imaginable.
I felt like I was being physically pushed down whist trying to parent, look after myself and deal with all the admin that comes with losing someone.
People would say how strong I was and ask, “how do you do it?” but to be honest, I was just surviving. Imagine a swan on the water, it looks calm on the surface but it’s paddling like hell underneath.
I had questions surrounding Ben’s sudden passing that I couldn’t answer: Could I have saved him? What if the paramedics arrived sooner? Did I do something wrong? Did I do CPR correctly? Why me? Why him? Would I relive those last moments for the rest of my life? I was torturing myself. I knew that I couldn’t carry on like that and reached out for help very soon after he died.
Fortunately, through the powers of Facebook, I was given the number of a very special person, who helped start my life changing journey.
Very soon after my therapy, and to be honest probably during it, I knew that all I wanted to do was help others struggling with pain, sadness, regrets (insert emotion of choice here!). I didn’t want anyone to feel like they had to live with it, that they had to carry on regardless. I wanted to show people that life can move forward. Not the way we intended it to, but to see that there is a future if you just reach out and make that first call for help. It’s a very difficult word for us to use, but when we do it can be life changing.
So, here I am, a fully qualified grief and loss therapist, certified through Edu-Therapy™. My passion to help others has grown during this time due to other losses I have endured but also from listening to other people’s losses.
I have survived and moved forward and so can you.
If you feel stuck, unsure about which way to turn, feel like you’re ‘just surviving’, struggling to find peace and happiness, I am here to listen with an open heart, no judgement, analysis or criticism.
I will make you feel safe, heard, and create opportunities for you to move forward through your loss.
Contact me