Sneaky Grief
Sometimes grief just sneaks up on you.
The intensity and rawness of my grief has changed a lot, I no longer feel intense emotional pain but my heart obviously holds a massive place for Ben and sometimes it aches for the children.
We’ve spent this weekend making a start on a “treehouse” in his memory at the children’s school and the grief has just come and hit me with sadness.
What gets me is that we’re creating a special place for the children to go and remember Ben when all they actually want is for their daddy to be here with them.
I’ve had a good cry, I feel better for it, but sometimes the unjustness of it all can knock me back a little.
Not a sympathy post but more of an it’s ok to still cry and have these moments. Like I said the intensity and emotional pain associated with my grief has changed, my life is growing around it, and I am moving forward, but my babies still want their daddy here and that makes me so sad for them 
